Sonic's Modern life
by halo7458963
Summary: Its been 25 years since sonic defeated eggman.Sonic has now turned or try to turn to a new life.But can he survive his son his wife and the fact that hes just plain lonely?
1. Chapter 1:Normal day

Chapter 1:normal day

Sonic was playing halo 3 for xbox360. He just shot some enemy and tea bagged his dead body. "Oh yeah I hope that makes you angry." said Sonic talking to himself. The sad thing is that Sonic is in story mode. It has been 25 years since he finished off egg man. Sonic is now 38 and he lives with his wife and son. Sonic heard the door open. "Oh crap"! Said Sonic. Sonic turned off the system and ran upstairs in his room and locked his door. Sonics son just got home and he went over to his xbox360 and felt the back." DAD WHY WERE YOU PLAYING MY SYSTEM"!!! Screamed Darin. Sonic was upstairs hiding under the bed sweating. Darin pulled out an axe and headed for his dad's door. He started swinging and the door busted open.

Sonic was under the bed sweating harder then ever." I wonder where he can be". Said Darin lying. He looked down and his foot was all wet. Darin looked over toward the bed and noticed a big puddle of sweat leading under the bed. He swung and torn the bed in half. Sonic looked up and screamed. Darin chased Sonic around the house until he got tired. He then went upstairs and started his homework. Sonic decided to go over to his neighbor Tails house to play halo 3.

Later at Tails house Sonic was once again tea bagging a story mode enemy." Sonic you do know that's a story mode enemy right?" asked Tails. "Yeah I know I'm just lonely." said Sonic." Well Cream and I will be leaving soon to go out to dinner.," said Tails ,"so how long are you going to be here. "I'm just staying here until my sons asleep", said Sonic." Well Sonic at least your married"' said Tails, "I'm still having sex with Barbie dolls." Wow your life must suck", said Sonic." So did you get that invite to Knuckles wedding", said Tails trying to change the subject." Yes I did and that's really sad how you tried to change the subject", said Sonic." Well are you going", asked Tails."Yeah I am" said Sonic", But Im not bringing Darin, remember what happened at the last wedding I brought Darin to?"

{Flashback}

Darin is wearing a wizard hat and hes on top of a big building holding the groom by the leg. The cops are at the bottom of the building looking up." SAY IT", screamed Darin . "OK, Ok your wizard hat is cool. "cried the groom

"Well I should go back before my wife comes home", said Sonic. And he got up and left Tails house. He got to his front door. He took a deep breath and opened the door bracing for impact.


	2. Chapter 2:Burger King

Chapter 2:Buger King

"WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN"!!! Screamed Rouge the bat to Sonic." Listen Rouge just because you're my wife (didn't see that coming did you) doesn't mean you have to scream at me." Said Sonic." Well I was going to go to the store to buy dinner but since you were gone I couldn't go because I would leave darin here by himself." Said Rouge "remember what happened last time we left him here by himself."

~Flashback~

Sonic and rouge come back from dinner only to find their house on fire and a clown doing a strip tease for a rapist

~Flashback Ends~

"Oh yeah I remember." said Sonic" So what should we feed him". "We?" said Rouge," YOUR taking him to Burger King for dinner since YOU weren't here when I needed to go. ""NNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOO", screamed Sonic. Darin popped his head from around the corner. "Judging by my dads screaming id say he's taking me out to eat." said Darin", well I'm not going", He said folding his arms. "You'd guys better go or else I will find a gun and shoot you all!" Said Rouge. Sonic and darin did not need to be told twice. Both of them jumped out the window that randomly appeared and got in the car and drove off. Half way down the street the light turned red and they had to wait. Sonic started an awkward conversation." So…. um have any friends", asked Sonic. "No", said Darin. "Oh umm….", said Sonic awkwardly then he started to whistle." So um how's school", asked Sonic "Don't care much for it," said Darin." Oh well umm what grade are you again"? Asked Sonic."4th", said Darin. "What but your like 14."Said Sonic surprised. "Yeah ive been held back a lot'. Said Darin." Really what for?" asked sonic afraid of what the answer might be. Darin opened his mouth to reply but at that moment the light turned green and sonic started to drive." Thank god" they both thought.

When they got to Burger King sonic went to the drive through only to find out it was out of order. "DAMMIT", said Sonic. So they went to park and they headed inside. There was a small line with only like 7 people so Sonic got in line and turned to Darin and said, "Go find a table."So Darin went over to look for a table. He found one near a window and sat down. Darin looked out the window and saw some guys jumping this other guy named Kalee Bats. Darin started to laugh at how they threw him around and started to punch him, so that kept him occupied for a while. Meanwhile Sonic got to the front and started to order. "Ok ill have one of those chicken fries and…""Do you want some bagels"? Said the cashier person. "Um no", said Sonic confused," anyways I also want a large…""We sell bagels now", Said the cashier." No I don't want any fucking bagels now take my damn order", said sonic," so back to my order I want…""What do you have against bagels", asked the cashier." STOP WITH THE FUCKING BAGELS I DON'T WANT ANY! Screamed sonic. People were starting to stare and Darin ducked under the table. "Ok I want…""Buy some bagels, "Said the cashier. "ALL RIGHT FINE GIVE ME BAGELS!! "Screamed Sonic."OK but they take 30 minutes to cook", said the cashier."DAMN IT" screamed Sonic

Sonic walked over to the table where Darin was hiding." What are you doing", said Sonic looking under the table."Tryin not to be embarrassed", said Darin coming out from under the table,"Hey how come you didn't call me so I could order"? "We are eating bagels weather you like it or not," said sonic" What happened up there any ways," asked Darin." Ill tells you later,"said Sonic." No tell me now", said Darin. ~10 minutes later~. …And that's what happened", said sonic." Wow that sucks dick," said Darin," A 30 minute wait this really does suck." Well while we wait," said Sonic," we should go wash are our hands." So they got up and walked to the bathroom. When they got in they heard some moaning coming from the last stall. Darin walked toward the stall and knocked and said," Are you Ok in there."" Damn it cant a guy masturbate in here with out interruptions." Said the familiar voice." Wait a minute Mr. Tails from across the street." said Darin." What", yelled sonic as he ran for the last stall. He opened the stall only to see tails holding his dick in between his hands." Wait I can explain," pleaded Tails. "Nope sorry ive got to show this to my friend," said sonic taking a picture on his phone and sending it to his friend.

Calvin (from Calvin and hobbies) picked up his phone and saw the picture and laughed.

Sonic and Darin walked out of the restrooms with his hands washed and sat down at the table when they heard the cashier yelled" ORDER OF BAGELS FOR MR. HEDGEHOG ARE Ready. Sonic got up to pick them up when he got there the cashier asked" Do you want a free bag with that?" No I don't," said sonic as he gabbed the tray." Well how about some dounuts", the cashier asked. Sonic punched him and walked back to the table with the bagels. Sonic sat down at the table when he noticed some gold cardboard." What the hell is this," said sonic picking up the piece of cardboard." I think its one of those crappy king hats", said Darin. "Oh cool," said sonic. He started to unfold it when it ripped low budgetly. "Shit," said Sonic and he threw it behind his back. Darin started to eat while looking outside watching the guy still getting beat up (they are using bats now). Sonic was about to take a bite of his bagel when he looked out side and saw the guy getting beat up. "What the hell, "said sonic," I can't eat while looking at this, it's disturbing"." Well I see it as front row seats to a movie," said Darin." Well I'm going to put a stop to It.," said Sonic standing up. He walked outside toward the gang members while Darin watched from the window. Sonic started to talk to them and a few seconds later they started jumping Sonic. Darin watched his father getting jumped. He saw Sonic mouth help me but Darin shook his head, lay back with a dounut in his hand and watched the action.

Ten minutes later Sonic walked back in covered in blood. "Why the hell didn't you help me", screamed Sonic." Are you kidding they could have killed me." Said Darin." Whatever lets just go home, "said Sonic. They got back inside the car and drove home promising not to speak of anything that happened to anyone ever.


	3. Chapter 3: A Day At The Pool

Chapter 3: a day at the pool

Sonic woke up the next day trying to forget what happened last night. He looked over to see his wife but found out she was not there. Then he looked at the clock and saw it was 10:00."Oh yeah its Saturday." He said."SONIC COME DOWN HERE!" screamed Rouge. Sonic fell out of bed and walked down stairs. Sonic saw that Rouge was in a two-piece bikini."Come on rouge its to early for sex," said Sonic."What, all you men think about is sex, sex, sex why don't you keep your dick where your mouth is!'Screamed Rouge."Whats going on", said Darin half-asleep walking down the stairs."Well since the pool is open we are going to the pool." Said Rouge."What the pool!"Said Darin full awake now,"do you remember what happened last time?"

~Flash back~

"OH SHIT ITS CALEB!" yelled Darin. Everybody turned there head toward the diving board and saw a fat guy about to jump off."EVERYBODY EVACUATE THE POOL NOW THIS IS NOT A DRILL," yelled the lifeguard. Every body started running out as fast as they could. When Sonic, Darin, and Rouge got in the car they heard someone scream," HE JUMPED"!"DRIVE DRIVE!"Yelled Darin."All right, all right,"said sonic putting the keys in the ignition."OH SHIT,"yelled Darin. (The camera zooms out on the earth and you can see a giant explosion coming from where the pool is). Sonic was driving hard corely away from the big wave of water. When they got home Sonic slammed the door turned to his family and said,"Let's not talk about this ever again to anybody."Everybody nodded their heads and went their separate ways in the house and did not talk to each other for the rest of day.

~Flash back ends~

"We weren't supposed to talk about ever again", said Rouge slapping Darin in the back of the head," and besides Caleb got banned from the pool.""Ok then let's go," said Sonic already in his swimming trunks. They all got in the car and headed toward the pool, but then a person dressed all in black with his collar over his mouth and a hat pulled over his eyes watched them go down the road. The mysterious person started to follow them. When they got there they paid there admission and went inside when they heard a familiar voice." Sonic, is that you"? Said Big the Cat walking toward them."Oh god try not to make eye contact."Said Sonic covering his face with his hand."Hey Sonic that is you", said Big the Cat now running toward them. Sonic, Rouge, and Darin watched something disturbing as Big ran toward them. Big just got out of the pool so he was all wet and he's fat. (attention this next part is really disturbing)Big was running toward them with his big ass man boobs flapping all wet up and down. Rouge was about to throw up and Darin looked up at Sonic and said,"Dad I'm scared."When Big got closer the ground started to rumble. They tried there best to stay up."Hey Sonic look at you and your family that's lovely." Said Big sounding all gay."Hey are you gay"? Blurted out Darin. Sonic slapped him in the back of the head and said,"Sorry my son does not know when to shut up.""Well its ok," said big,"I am gay."Sonic and Rouge both gasped and Darin busted out laughing on the ground."UM wow big I did not know you were "ahem" that way."Said Rouge akwardly."Well duh, why did you think I was on team rose." Said big," hey do you guys want to see my husband"?"Uh well sure", said Sonic trying to be polite."Ok then,"said big," Rotor come here." Sonic, Rouge and Darin looked over and saw a fat walrus walking over with a baby in his hand.

"You've got to be kidding me", said Sonic."Oh snap, no he didn't,"said Darin moving his head side to side and snapping his fingers in random places. Sonic and rouge both looked at Darin and then slapped him in the back of the head."You know that's getting old," said Darin."Yeah but not for us,"said Rouge."Guys here comes Rotor,"said Sonic. Rotor walked over kissed big (YUCK GAY ACTION) and looked at Sonic."Hhhhheeeeeyyyy," said Rotor in a gay tone," How's it going Sonic"."Um… good I guess,"said Sonic felling akward,"Wait if you are both guys how did you have a baby."Asked Darin. Sonic slapped Darin in the back of the head."Sorry my son is always asking questions." Said sonic glaring at Darin."Don't worry he's just curious," said Rotor

10 minutes later

"…And that's how it happened,"said Rotor. Rouge, Sonic, and Darin all had discussed faces."Ok well time to go."Said Big putting his arm around Rotor,"See ya."They walked out and left."Well let's get swimming,"said rouge trying to make them forget what they just heard. Then Sonic and Darin remembered why they came. They found a place to sit then they jumped in the pool but a little while away the mysterious man was eyeing the diving board. Rouge was getting a tan when some nerds who are 35 years old and still live with their parents came over toward her."Hey," said one of the nerds," your hot can I touch your boobs"?"What the hell, NO, said Rouge,"now go away I'm tanning here."Then all of a sudden the nerds jumped on Rouge and started touching her in places…Meanwhile Sonic was sitting on the side of the pool afraid of the water. Darin snuck up and pushed Sonic into the pool."What the hell,"screamed Sonic scrambling up onto the side again. But then Darin looked over toward the diving board and saw the mysterious guy standing on the board high up. The person threw off the clothes and this is what happened next.

"OH SHIT ITS CALEB!" yelled Darin. Everybody turned there head toward the diving board and saw a fat guy about to jump off."EVERYBODY EVACUATE THE POOL NOW THIS IS NOT A DRILL," yelled the lifeguard. Every body started running out as fast as they could. When Sonic, Darin, and Rouge got in the car they heard someone scream," HE JUMPED"!"DRIVE DRIVE!"Yelled Darin."All right, all right,"said sonic putting the keys in the ignition."OH SHIT,"yelled Darin. (The camera zooms out on the earth and you can see a giant explosion coming from where the pool is). Sonic was driving hard corely away from the big wave of water. When they got home Sonic slammed the door turned to his family and said,"Let's not talk about this ever again to anybody."Everybody nodded their heads and went their separate ways in the house and did not talk to each other for the rest of day.

But then the doorbell rang and sonic came down and awnerserd it. He opened it and saw tails with a bag full of all his stuff in it."Are you going on a trip," asked Sonic."No,"said tails sounding serious,"Im moving in.

TO BE CONTINUED

If you want me to write about what Rotor explained to Sonic and them send me a message and ill do it.


	4. Chapter 4: Tails Moves In?

Chapter 4: Tails moves in?

"What?" said Sonic suprized at what he heard,"Why are you moving in…. HERE"?"Well for one thing it's your fault,"said tailes."What…how?" said sonic confused."Well here's what happened."Said tails,"Well remember when you caught me masturbating at burger king, well I worked there. And when you took that picture and sent it to your friend, he sent it to his friends and they sent it to their friends and it somehow got to my boss. He fired me for being unclean while on my break. So I was unemployed on tax day. I didn't pay my taxes so the damn government dragged me out of the house So now I need a place to live, and since it IS your fault I lost my house AND my job I choose to move in with you. Sonic was about to say hell no and slam the door but Rouge heard the whole thing and said,"ok sure you can live here for as long as you need to."

Rouge showed Tails to his room and tails settled in. when Tails was done with his room he came down stairs to watch TV with Sonic and Darin. They were watching George Lopez. " I bet hill be like on the dance floor doing the Bart dance Sauske watch out". Said George Lopez starting to do the Bart dance."Wow George Lopez is not funny,"said Darin," all he does is say something that is not funny and does something to make him look stupid like making dumb faces or a dumb dance.""Well I think he's pretty funny," said tails. Sonic and Darin both glared at tails. Then the fresh prince of bel-air came on and sonic said,"finally a funny show."~10 minutes later~. Darin turned to MTV2 and they saw a rock song video about to end."Rock sucks all it i is a bunch of mind less screaming and guitars playing." Then a Kanye West song came on and Darin said,"finally something that makes sense". Then they turned the channel and saw phinese and ferb and Darin shouted" OH SHIT NO" and turned off the TV

"Well its getting late it's time to go to bed," said Sonic getting up," and plus Rouge promised we could have sex tonight so NO interruptions. Later Sonic and Rouge were under the covers doing it when Tails walked in turned on the lights. Rouge screamed "What the hell are you doing." She screamed."What the hell tails I said NO interruptions." Said Sonic."Yeah sorry I just wanted to bring to your attention that we are out of cheetos and sun chips so just letting you know," said Tails. Sonic and Rouge looked at each other than looked at Tails and shouted,""GO TO BED TAILS"." WELL ITS REALLY HARD TO WHEN I HEAR YOU GUYS MOANING LOUDLY EVERY FUCKING 10 SECONDS." Shouted Tails and then he slammed the door.

~The next day~

Sonic was up watching one of those rap groups on BET when he got an idea."Im going to form my own rap group," said sonic. He ran up stairs and knocked on Tails door. Tails opened up the door wide-awake and sweating."Um… what's…um you know never mind Tails I'm going to form a rap group are you in?" asked Sonic."Uh sure," said Tails,"I will be down in a second,"Then tails shut the door all quick, Sonic wondered what he was doing but he decided to let it go and go to Darin's room. Meanwhile in Tails room."Ok where were we?" said Tails getting back in his bed with a Barbie doll. Sonic knocked on Darin's door. Darin opened the door a little bit so Sonic couldn't see what's inside."Oh hey dad what do you want", said Darin."Im forming a rap group and you're joining" said Sonic."Why me," said Darin."Well the younger female viewers will find you attractive and if you don't you're grounded.""Ok I will ill be down in a sec."Said Darin then he slammed the door real quick. Sonic wondered what he was doing in there but he couldn't care lees. Meanwhile in Darin's room Darin was doing his homework."Ok what's the awnser to this"? Said Darin to the nerd chained up on the wall."Ill never tell you." Shouted the nerd. Darin grabbed a whip and whipped the nerd."Ok ill tell you its 18…18!" screamed the nerd."That's what I thought," said Darin writing the answer down.

Tails and Darin came down stairs a few seconds later. When they got down they saw that Sonic had on a blue shirt, ripped pants around the knees, a hat on side ways, black T-pain glasses on, a gold chain with an S on it, some fresh shoes on, and some gold rings on his fingers. Tails and Darin starred in amazement. "Um sonic I think you might have over done it." Said Tails."Well come on we are burning day light,"said sonic,"Here put these on," he said handing them clothes few minutes later they came out in there new clothes on. Tails had on Orange glasses on, an green shirt on, blue shorts that go down to his ankles, a belt with a T on it, a long orange scarf, some cool looking orange shoes, a hat turned backwards that showed his three hairs sticking out. Darin had on a black shirt with a gold chain with a D on it, some glasses on his shorts below his waist (Yes he wearing boxers) , some white and blue shoes on, and some gold in his teeth."Wait I did not give you the teeth thing," said Sonic."Yeah I know I just added this,"said Darin.'Well," said sonic,"From hear on out we will be known as STD!"


	5. Sonic and Tails look for a job pt 1

Chapter 5: Sonic and Tails look for a job pt. 1

Sonic woke up in the middle of the night. Rouge woke up and looked at Sonic. "What's wrong," asked Rouge. "I had this weird dream where me Darin and tails formed a rap group." Said Sonic rubbing his head."Well Sonic I think its time I told you this." Said Rouge sounding serious." Tomorrow I want you and tails to go out and find a job, Because I'm the only person who has a job in this house". "Well what about Darin when he had that job as a person who tells you where to find places in the mall," said Sonic

~Flash back~

Darin is in a booth with the words HELP HERE on the top. Darin is reading a magazine."Um excuse me sir can you show me where I can find the lonely old women section," said a random lonely old lady. "Yeah it's somewhere," said Darin not interested. "Please sir I need to…. .Ack," said the old lady," ack help ack I'm choking ack I think I'm having a heart attack"." Hey can you keep it down I'm trying to read." Said Darin not looking at the old lady."But I…" started the old lady but then she collapsed on the counter of the booth."Ewww that's disgusting," said Darin grabbing a stick and poking her until she fell off. " Oh my God mother," yelling a random 24 year old guy and running to the old ladies side." Why didn't you help her." Said the guy looking at Darin."What," said Darin,"Oh I did she's on the floor isn't she"? "That's it you're fired," said the man."What are you my boss"? Said Darin."Yes I am." Said the man."Oh well in that case…". Said Darin then he hoped from behind the counter kicked the old lady on the floor then kicked the man and made a run for it.

~Flash back over~

"Yeah well that doesn't matter Sonic you're getting a job tomorrow and that's that," said Rouge and then she turned over and went to sleep. Sonic was still awake thinking about what will happen tomorrow and about his embarrassing secret that he ha kept for so many years. It was hard but he fell asleep.

The Next Day

Sonic woke up because he heard a loud yelp come from the room next to his. He got up went to next room and opened the door only to find tails in the bed with cream the rabbit. "OH MY GOD!" yelled Sonic. Tails and Cream stopped and looked at Sonic blushing with big smiles across their faces. "Well tails I'm surprised you have finally moved from Barbie dolls to a real thing". Said Sonic. "What does he mean Barbie dolls." Asked cream looking at Tails. "Uh I don't know," said Tails looking at Sonic with a face that meant shut the hell up. "Anyway tails Rouge wants me to bring you along to find a job," said Sonic. "Well actually sonic I'm kind of moving in with Cream after Knuckles wedding (in chapter 9) so I don't need a job until I get there," said Tails. " Yeah but in order for this story to get interesting I need to bring you along for more laughs," said Sonic. "What are you talking about when you say story," said Tails confused. "Um never mind Tails get your ass up and come on and Cream let me sit down and you can put your clothes on while I watch now come on," said Sonic.

After watching Cream put her clothes on Sonic and Tails headed out to Find A Job company. When they got there the man asked them some personal questions and then this happened "Well I have a perfect job for you Mr. Hedgehog," said the business man," But theirs only on thing wrong" "What's wrong," asked Tails. Sonic was sweating hard, he knew his secret would be reveled. "Well it says here Mr. Hedgehog never completed Elementary School," said the business man," so in order for me to give you a job your going to have to go back to elementary school." "GASP", gasped Sonic and Tails


	6. Sonic and Tails look for a job pt2 schol

SPECIAL ANOUNCEMENT: Hello guys this is tails if you are a fan of this story than you should check out my life called Tails jacked up life. It's my side of the story so check it out.

Chapter: 6: Sonic and Tails look for a job pt.2 School

"What the hell do you mean Sonic has never gone to school." Said Tails looking at the guy."Its true Tails I never completed school I dropped out to fight crime." Said sonic looking ashamed. "Well I fought crime but still had time for school." Said Tails. "Well all you have to do is go there for one day," said the guy," so you and Tails should not be there long. "Wait why me I already completed…uh what grade do we have to complete." Asked Tails. "Fourth grade," said the man. "Oh well yeah I have already completed that grade, so why should I go," asked Tails. "So it will be a funnier story." Said Sonic looking at the guy smiling and they both started laughing. "What are you talking about Sonic?" asked Tails. "Nothing hurry hit him," said the man. Sonic grabbed a bat and hit Tails hard on the head.

~The next day~ MONDAY

Tails woke up in his bed. "TAILS TIME FOR SCHOOL." Screamed Rouge. Oh yeah its Monday." Thought Tails. He got out of bed when he heard Rouge yell "TAILS BEFORE YOU COME DOWN GET SONIC FROM THE ROOM." So Tails turned and headed for Sonics room. He opened it only to find him on the computer. "What are you looking at." Asked Tails. "I'm on reading this awesome story by starfighter-105 its pretty cool." Said Sonic turning around," so what do you want." "Come on it's time to go to school." Said Tails. Sonic and Tails went down stairs ate breakfast and left the house to go down to there bus stop. When they got there, there were 5 guys at the bus stop. 2 were talking and the other ones were kicking at a dead bird. "Hey your Sonic the Hedgehog," said one of the guys," My names Reggie how's it going are you coming to are school?" "Uh yeah," said Sonic. "Hey I'm Tails the fox don't you want to greet me." Said Tails desperately. "Uh no not really," said Reggie. "Hey Cameron come over here." The other guy came over there and looked at Tails and said "Your not cool," "I know," said Tails putting his head down in shame. The bus came and Reggie said,"Nice meeting you I hope you're in my class." And he walked on the bus. Sonic and Tails looked at each other and went on the bus.

~The Bus ride to school~

Sonic and Tails got on the bus and sat in the middle. Some of the kids starred at him and Tails. When the got to the next bus stop some big guy who thought he was cool walked up to Sonic and said "Hey that's my seat SonDICK". He started to laugh but no one else did so he stopped. "Come on get up before I punch you", said the wannabe cool guy."If you want to hurt Sonic you will have to get through me," said Tails standing up in the seat behind Sonic. The wannabe looked at Tails then threw him against the window. "Oh shit I peed myself," said Sonic getting scarred. The wannabe was about to punch sonic when Cameron shot a rubber band at the back of the head."Ow who did that?" said the wannabe. "I did," said Cameron raising his hand. The wannabe started to walk toward him when Reggie tripped him. He fell on the ground, Reggie picked him up and pushed him toward the back while Cameron said,"Yeah know your place. Leslie " Leslie turned his head and walked toward the back of the bus."Hey thanks guys," said Sonic."Hey why didn't you help me when he threw me agenits the window," said Tails getting up from the floor rubbing a bloody bump. "Oh sorry must of missed that," said Cameron lying. The bus stopped and sonic just realized they were at school. Everybody started to load off the bus. Sonic was about to get off when Lesli stopped him and said," Ill get you later". And he got off the bus. When Sonic and Tails got of the bus and looked at the school they both knew that it was going to be a long day.

~Sonic's Day~ (if you want to see how Tails day went you will have to wait for that chapter in Tails jacked up life)

Sonic and Tails came out of the principle office with the names of their teachers. They noticed that they got different teachers. They got to their classes and also realized that their classrooms were right next to each other's. They said their good-byes and headed in their different directions. Sonic opened the door to his classroom and saw that it was like a train reeks. All the kids were out of their seats and either throwing paper balls or jumping some kid in the corner. Sonic sat down in the front when he heard a familiar voice say," Hey Sonic." Sonic turned his head and saw Reggie walking toward him."So you're in my class for a day sweet, but I feel bad for Cameron he's with Tails," said Reggie."Hey GAYHOG," said Leslie," I'm gonna hurt you," At that moment the teacher walked in and everybody quickly took there seats except for the kids who got jumped but now they are dead."Ok 5 dead kids," said the teacher writing the names down. "Anyway I'm Mrs. Spencer and I am saying this because I see we have a new student. Everybody turned their head and looked at Sonic. The teacher turned around to take attendance. Everybody was still looking at Sonic and started to sweat when Leslie coughed and said"Loser," Then he started to laugh at his own joke. Every body was now looking at Leslie looking like a fool laughing at his own when Reggie grabbed a text book and threw it at him and said," YOUR NOT FUNNY." Then everybody started to laugh even Sonic laughed to."Ok everybody calm down its looks like everybody's here accept," the teacher stopped when the door busted open. "Your late again," said Mrs. Spencer."So," said the familiar voice. Sonic heard the voice and turned to look and Sonic screamed. Darin looked over and screamed to. Yep folks Darin and Sonic are in the same class.

This is the authur, i am holding a poll of what i should do for the next sonics modern life just go on my profile page to vote. After 2 weeks i will anounce the one that won in one of the chapters. so check out the chapters to see the winner


	7. Chapter 7: Sonic's jacked up day

Chapter 7: Sonics Day at school.

After 4 minutes of screaming Sonic and Darin both calmed down. "Um Darin do you know this student," asked Mrs. Spencer. "Yeah bitch, he's my dad," said Darin," That's is I'm not in this chapter I'm leaving." And with that he closed the door and left. "Ok that was awkward ok everybody turn to chapter 28 of your text books and start to read," said Mrs. Spencer. The whole class moaned and did as they were told. Sonic was not really interested and had to get out for a second. Sonic raised his hand. "Yes Sonic," said the teacher looking at the fly flying around her head. "Uh can I go to the bathroom," said Sonic. The teacher started to jump up and try to smack the fly, but Sonics attention was focussed on her boobs bouncing up and down. She finally got the fly and said," Sure". She was sweating and started to rub her boobs and said," Man its hard to have good quality boobs like these" And then she squeezed them. Sonic turned around and said," Did anybody else get a boner when she did that?" Everybody was looking at Sonic. "No me neither," Said Sonic felling awkward," Hey do you know what's cool, walking like a gorilla. And then Sonic started to walk like a gorilla covering his boner looking like an idiot.

Sonic got in the bathroom and his boner finally ended. Then he looked at the referral he got for walking different, disrespecting the schools rules, and spreading his gangster ways. "Shit," said Sonic but then a kidnigardener came out of the stalls and said," AWWWW IM TELLING". And the kid ran out but then the person who came in next was Tails. Tails had a bloody nose and a cone hat with the word "dunce" on it. "Tails what the hell happened to you," said sonic looking at him. "I don't want to talk about it," said Tails starting to wash his face," So how's your time going"? "Not bad," said Sonic," But Darin was in my class but he left and said he did not want to be apart of this chapter." "What are you talking about," said Tails looking confused. "Oh nothing," said Sonic as he started to laugh," Anyway I'm heading back how about you"? "I'm going to masturbate then ill go back," said Tails. Sonic looked back with a awkward face but then he headed back to class.

Sonic came back to class with another referral for being blue and naked. Sonic just sat down when an announcement came on that said," SONIC THE HEDGEHOG PLEASE REPORT TO THE PRINCABLES OFFICE". Sonic got up with a sigh and headed for the principle office. When Sonic got there he was about speak to the person at the front but then Sonic noticed something awfully familiar about the guy but then Sonic remembered fast. "Hey do you want a free pen"? It was the guy from burger king who forced Sonic to buy bagels. "No I'm here to see the principle," said Sonic. "Take a free pen," said the guy. "No all I need to do is see the…." "Take a pen" said the guy cutting Sonic off. "NO I DON'T NEED NO FUCKING PEN," yelled Sonic. "What do you have agents free pens," asked the guy. "Fine give me a pen," said Sonic. Sonic took the free pen and headed inside the principle office. "Hello Sonic," said the principle," Here take a free pen," He said holding a cup of pens. Sonic took some with out arguing. "Now Sonic I have been informed that you have been using some cruse words." Said the principle. "What you have no proof," said Sonic. "Well actually I do," said the principle pointing to the corner and there sat the kid who heard Sonic cuss. The kid stuck his tongue out. "Why you little…." Said Sonic about to beat up the kid but then the principle said "Sonic stop this will not be tolerated." But then the principle leaned closer to Sonic and whispered," Wait until recess and he's all yours." Sonic got an evil smile on his face. "Ok that's it send the next guy in on your way out," said the principle. Sonic got up and opened the door and said,"Hey who ever is next it is your turn." Then Sonic saw Tails heading in but before Tails went in Sonic asked," What did you do"? "I was caught masturbating," said Tails then he headed inside.

Sonic walked back to the classroom when he heard the teacher say, "Ok time for lunch." Sonic got in line and the class started to move out. When Sonic got in the lunchroom he got some mash potatoes and gravy and started to find a place to sit. Then Sonic noticed Reggie waving signaling him to sit with him. Sonic started to walk toward them when he bumped into Leslie and spilled his lunch all over him. All the people in the cafeteria all at once started saying "AAAAAWWWWWWW". Leslie looked down at his shirt then grabbed Sonic by the neck and said "That's it gayhog during recess meet me on the play ground we are going to have a diss off." Then he let go of Sonic and went to the bathroom. The whole cafeteria was quiet. Sonic sat down at the table were Reggie, Cameron, And Tails were sitting and said," this day sucks I have all these referrals I was sent to the principles office and now I have to face Leslie in a diss off, I don't even know any good disses. "Well you could go to the computer lab and look for some," suggested Cameron. "Yeah I guess ill do that." Said Sonic. Sonic was about to leave when Reggie said," Sonic take this". Reggie handed Sonic a piece of folded up paper. "What is it," asked Sonic. "Open it only when the time is right," said Reggie sounding wise. Sonic with an unsure face got up and headed for the computer lap. When Sonic got up a nerdy kid named Cameron Mamelton asked if he could sit at the table. Reggie said hell no then Cameron Mamelton shot himself.

After spending the whole lunchtime in the computer lab remembering disses, Sonic headed out side, its recess time! When sonic got to the playground Leslie started to walk up to him. Then a whole bunch of kids started to crowd around to see the diss fight. "Are you ready" said Leslie smiling. "Yeah." Said Sonic sounding all heroic. "OK then your mom is so dumb she got tangled up in a cordless phone," said Leslie. "OOOOHHHHHH," shouted the crowd. Sonic only smiled. "Your so dumb it took you a hour to make minute soup," said Sonic back. "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHH" shouted the crowd louder, then they all turned their heads toward Leslie. "At least my mother likes me," said Leslie. "OOOOOHHHHHHH"," shouted the crowd. "Well ok but at least I do not look like a piece of SHIT!" said Sonic. "OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH" shouted the crowd. And it pretty much went on like that. Diss after diss, and the crowd continuously shouting "OOOHHH" even if they don't get it. "Well you are so ugly you went inside a haunted house and you came out with a job application," said Leslie. "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" shouted the crowd. Sonic did not know what to do, he ran out of comebacks and disses it looks like he lost. But then he remembered the piece of paper Reggie gave to him. Sonic took it out, unfolded it and read it. Sonic got a smile on his face looked up at Leslie and said, "Your mom is so fat she uses the drive way to iron her clothes" "OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH" shouted the crowd. Leslie started to cry and he ran away. The crowd started to cheer as they picked sonic up and started chanting his name. Then the teachers said it was time to come in. Everybody put down sonic and started to head in. Sonic was about to head in but then he remembered something. Sonic ran to the kidergarterners area, found the guy who told on him, and he started to beat the shit out of him. When Sonic was done he ran inside.

It was the end of the day and everybody headed out to there buses. Sonic got on the bus and sat in the middle. "So I heard that you won your fight against Leslie," said Reggie sitting down in the seat to the left of Sonic. "Yeah I did, say where were you, Cameron, and Tails." asked Sonic. Tails walked on the bus even bloodier then before. "We were trying to help Tails with his bully but he lost badly," said Cameron sitting in the seat in front of Sonic. "I suck," said Tails sitting in the seat behind Sonic Then Leslie walked on the bus and said to Sonic," I don't care if you beat me because after today you wont be at the school anymore." Then with a smile he headed toward the back of the bus. Sonic just got a excellent idea in his head. When they got off the bus Tails turned to Sonic and said," So what job are you gonna get?" Sonic looked at Tails with an evil smile and Tails smiled evilly back too. They both were thinking about the same thing.

~The Next day~

"Ok students," said the principle," We have a new teacher may I introduce you to Mr. Hedgehog". Sonic walked in and smiled an evil smile at Leslie. "NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" screamed Leslie. The principle left and Sonic took out a wipe and started wiping Leslie. "My dad is a police officer ill have him arrest you," cried Leslie. "Yeah sure." Said Sonic and he continued to wipe him.

The end

Next chapter: Sonic and Tails go to jail coming soon


	8. Chapter 8: Sonic and Tails go to jail

This is an announcement to all my readers, this summer I am going to start 2 more humor stories called Spongebob's messed up life and phinese and ferb's fucked up life so look out for those this summer!!!!

Chapter 8: Sonic and Tails go to Jail

Sonic was walking to his new job smiling and holding a wipe in his hand. He couldn't wait to wipe Leslie some more. While he was walking he turned around and saw Tails running up to him. When Tails caught up he said," So are you gonna torture your bully today?" "Hell yeah," said Sonic, "What do you have to torture your bully with," Tails held up a tazer in his hand. "Nice," said sonic giving thumbs up. When Sonic and Tails got to the school they noticed a police cars in front of the school. Sonic and Tails looked at each other than continued to walk. When they got to their classrooms they went in. Sonic opened the door and said," Ok where is Lesli…." Sonic stopped and saw Leslie standing by a police officer. "Is it career day already," asked Sonic. "No this is my dad," said Leslie smiling. "Sonic the hedgehog you are under arrest for child abuse" said Leslie's dad pulling handcuffs out. Sonic looked horrified but then he had an idea. "Ok but before you arrest me you must answer this riddle, a cowboy goes to a town on Friday, he stays for 3 days then leaves on Friday how does he do it?" The officer looked at Sonic then he tackled him and put him in handcuffs. The officer pulled Sonic out of the classroom. When Sonic was pulled out he looked to his side and saw another officer pulling Tails out in a strain jacket.

When they were out of the school the officer threw Tails in the car. He was about to throw Sonic in but Leslie's dad stopped him and said" Be fore you go to jail how did the cowboy do it?" Sonic leaned close to his ear and whispered," His horse's name was Friday." "That is the gayest riddle ever", said Leslie's dad. "Don't blame me blame iCarly', Said Sonic as the police officer threw Sonic in the car. The officers hoped in the car and started to drive. "What did you do," whispered Sonic. "Hey no whispering" yelled the officer spiting all over Sonic. He turned back around and Tails whispered to Sonic," I kind of tazed the officer." Said Tails. The officer turned back around and yelled," STOP TALKING PEOPLE LIKE YOU MAKE ME SICK." He spit all over Sonic and Tails. The officer turned back around and pulled out a box of donuts. He turned to Leslie's dad and said," Want some donut's." Don't start with me Fred," said Leslie's dad. Fred put his head down in shame. "So why did you put me in a strain jacket." Asked Tails that just fell out of his seat and was now on the ground. "It looked cool at the time." Said Fred. "Um there is a dead bird under the seat," said Tails. "Oh so that's where Eddie went," said Leslie's dad."Were here." Sonic looked up and saw that they were at the prison.

The officer's started to drag Sonic and Tails to their cell. Half way to their cell's when the Fred started to drag Tails in a different cell. "Wait don't me and Tails share a cell?" asked Sonic. "Hell no you share a cell with big D" said Leslie's dad with a smile on his face. "Who's big D," asked Sonic afraid of the answer. They stopped in front of a cell. Leslie's dad took the handcuffs off of Sonic then threw him in the cell. "WELL WELL WELL NEW MEAT." Boomed a voice in the cell. Then a big guy stepped out of the shadows. "PEOPLE CALL ME BIG D BUT YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR KILLER," said big D. Sonic looked frightened. Leslie's dad smiled and started to walk away when Sonic quickly turned around and said" Wait I deserve my one phone call." Leslie's dad let Sonic out and took him to the phone. Sonic dialed his house number. "Who the hell is this" said Darin. "Darin it's me Sonic I…. Why are you not at school?" asked Sonic. "Why aren't YOU," said Darin. "What never mind I need you to get a Sonic and Tails plush toy, some hammers and put it all in a cake," said Sonic starting to whisper. "If I feel like it bye." Said Darin then he hung up the phone. "WHAT DARIN DARIN FUCK." Screamed Sonic hanging up the phone," I should have called Rouge." "Ok back to the cell," said Leslie's dad grabbing Sonic and dragging him. "Wait can't you get me a better cell please pleases." Pleaded Sonic. Leslie's dad ignored him and threw him inside the cell.

Sonic was wussing in the corner in the cell holding a cross while big D was shaping his knife. When he was done he started to head for Sonic when the cell door opened, "Sonic the hedgehog", said the cop. Sonic dashed for the door and said," I'm free to go?" "No you have a therapist session to go to." Said the cop. "What why the hell do I need counting," said Sonic sounding outraged. "Come on and hurry or else I will just close the door and you and your cell mate get back to playing." Sonic turned his head and saw big D giving a signal to come here. "Let's go," said Sonic.

~ Meanwhile~

"Hey you should go get sonic and bring him to his therapy session," said a cop talking to another cop on the computer. "Ok I will," said the other cop," But I am reading this fan fiction called me myself & sonic and I just wanted to know, is this supposed to be funny." Then he got up and went to go get sonic.

The cop lead sonic to the therapist room. When Sonic got in it was a small room with a couch, a chair and a desk. "Hello Mr. Hedgehog" said a voice from behind the desk," I am Mr. Cal and I will be your therapist." Sonic sat down on the couch. "So why are you in jail?" asked Mr. Cal. "Well I wiped a student of mine to death." Said Sonic. "Hmm ok I think you need to manage your anger instead of taking your anger out on other people," said Mr. Cal. "What all I did was get pay back." Said Sonic sitting up straight now. "Calm down I think I will have to sign you up for anger management classes." Said Mr. Cal. "What you have no proof that I have anger problems," said Sonic standing up now. Mr. Cal pushed a button on his desk and said," Send him in".

The door opened and the bagels guy walked in. "Hello Mr. Bagels does this person have anger issues"? Asked Mr. Cal pointing at Sonic. "Yes he does I was trying to sell him a bagel and…." "What no he was forcing me to buy a bagel." Said Sonic cutting the bagels guy off. "Let him finish," said Mr. Cal. "Well I was trying to sell him a bagel and he screamed at me then when I gave him the food and asked if he wanted a free bag and some donuts then he punched me," said the bagels guy putting his head down. "Its ok," said Mr. Cal patting the bagels guy on the back. "Want a bagel," asked the bagels guy holding up a bagel. "Yes, yes I would thank you, you are free to go." Said Mr. Cal. The bagels guy walked out. "Ok in a hour you will be heading to anger management classes." Said Mr. Cal writing something. He handed it to Sonic and said," Ok you can go and send the next guy in." Sonic walked out and said,"NEXT". Sonic saw Tails walking in shaking nervously. "What happened why are you going to therapy." "Uh I got raped in the showers," said Tails shaking. Tails walked in the office and Sonic walked back to his cell.

After 30 minutes of cowering in the corner of his cell trying not to get killed the warden called out "LUNCH TIME EVERYBODY COME OUT OF THE CELL,". The cell doors opened and Sonic rushed out as quickly as he could. Once Sonic was in the lunchroom and got his lunch he sat at an empty table. Later Tails came over and joined him at the table. "So how is your day going," asked Sonic. Tails looked behind him and a guy that was bigger then him looked back at Tails. He pointed at Tails then made a 0 out of his hand then he pointed at himself and made his finger go up. Then he started to shove his finger in the 0 very fast and violently. Tails turned back around quickly and said," Well I am going to get raped again and the bad thing is I share a cell with the bagels guy AND I was forced to buy grape juice from THAT'S JUST GRAPE." Sonic shook his head and said "I hope Darin does what I asked him to do."

~Meanwhile where Darin is~

Darin is on the couch reading a magazine.

~Back were Sonic is~

"Well I have to leave and go to this gay anger management class," said Sonic. Sonic got up and threw his stuff away and left. When Sonic got to the class he opened it and saw a big D with a chair swinging it around. The teacher was cowering in the corner when he looked and saw Sonic. "Thank god help me," yelled the teacher. Sonic shook his head and closed the door. Sonic stayed in his cell the rest of the day. He was relived because big D was taken to a mental house. It was 8:00 when someone opened the cell and said," You have a visitor". Sonic looked up and saw Darin walk in with two cakes in his hand. One had an S on it the other had a T on it. "Here you go dad," said Darin. Then he leaned closer and whispered," Everything you need to bust out is in the cake," Then Darin walked out with the other cake and headed toward Tails cell. Once the guard closed the cell door Sonic got to work. He tore open the cake and found big sonic plush, a hammer and a drill, and a poster. Sonic started to tear his way through the wall. When he made it out he went back inside and put the Sonic doll in place. Sonic then put the poster over the hole then he made his escape. When Sonic got out and started to run he saw Tails. Sonic moved closer to Tails and they ran back home. While running Tails turned to Sonic and said "Hey Sonic if we wanted to bust out why didn't we just spin dash our way out." Sonic stopped and slapped his head and said," Dammit."

When Sonic and Tails got back to the house it was 7:00 in the morning. Sonic opened the door only to see Rouge with packed luggage's "Where are you going," asked Sonic. "Well I was waiting on you to get back from where ever you were." "So where are we going," asked Sonic again. "Don't tell me you forgot," said Rouge," We are going to Knuckles wedding!!!!!!"

Next chapter: The road trip

Sorry for the delay on this chapter but it is finally here. Any ways even if you do not have a profile you can still review my story so go head and review! And if you read the part about me myself and sonic, yes i am dissing it. It is 50 chapters of nothing funny I thought it would be funny but i was wrong. It was so bad it's the reason i made this story i wanted to give fan fiction a good humor story for sonic. So in a way thank you me myself and sonic, because of your afulness i came to make this story


	9. Chapter 9: The Road Trip Day 1

Chapter 9: The Road Trip- Day 1

"Knuckles wedding?" said sonic confused." It's THIS week." "Yes," replied Rouge," We have three days to get there before it starts." They heard a honk and they all turned around and saw cream in the car. "Well that's my ride," said Tails. He turned and ran inside the house packed his things then ran back out to the car and they drove away. Rouge threw a luggage into Sonics arms and said," Come on lazy ass start to load up the luggage's in the car." Then she went back into the house. "Bitch", whispered Sonic. "I HEARD THAT," yelled Rouge. Sonic looked around then started to load the luggage's in the car. When Sonic was done he looked back and saw Rouge coming out. "Go get your son and come on." Said Rouge getting in the car. Sonic wanted to argue but decided to let it go and go get Darin. Sonic got in the house when he saw Darin holding something in his hand.

"Uh dad I think Mr. Tails left one of his Barbie dolls here." Said Darin holding up a Barbie doll covered in sperm. "What the hell that's disgusting," said Sonic," When we get there we'll give it back." Sonic ran to the kitchen got a plastic bag and put the Barbie doll in it. Sonic and Darin walked out side (Sonic locked the door) And got in the car. "Ok here we go," said Sonic. Sonic pulled out of the driveway and started driving up the street. "Dad I need to go pee," said Darin. "What the fuck we were just at the house why didn't you go then." Said Sonic. "Well I did not NEED to go then," said Darin. "Well here," said Rouge grabbing a cup and handing it to Darin. "What the hell do I do with this." Asked Darin taking the cup. "You pee in It." Answered Rouge. "Fuck this I'm not peeing in this." Said Darin throwing the cup on the ground. "Well it's all your getting for the next 2 hours." Said Sonic. "Bitch" said Darin. "That's is I'm pulling over," said Sonic. Sonic pulled over the car grabbed his belt, got out of the car, grabbed Darin, went behind the car and started to let him have it. Rouge could hear whip noises and crying coming from behind the car put the cries of pain did not sound like Darin's. When Sonic got back in the car he was rubbing his back and had a tear on his eye. Rouge then looked back at Darin and saw him with the belt smiling. Rouge turned to sonic and said," Wow your sad". Sonic started the car and they started to drive off again.

Sonic and them finally pulled on to the highway with a LOT of traffic. "Oh damn," said Sonic," I should have watched the news." Darin was holding in his pee and looked like he was about to explode. "That's it," said Darin. He rolled down the window and started to pee out the window. The people in the car next to them started to stare. Darin looked at them and started to pee on the car then he aimed for the window. Bad news for the people because their window was down. The pee got on the guy who was driving shirt. Darin finished and quickly sat down and rolled up the window. The guy who got peed on honked his horn. Sonic looked over and the guy had his long middle finger up and said, "FUCK YOU". Sonic who did not know he was talking to Darin quickly said, "Well at least I don't masturbate with I can't believe it's not butter all over my dick." The traffic started to move again and before the guy could respond sonic quickly drove off.

On the way down the road Sonic looked at the fuel for his car and noticed that it was almost on empty. Sonic pulled off the highway and into a gas station. Rouge and Darin went inside to get refreshments and Sonic started to pump the gas. While sonic was waiting he heard a very annoying voice say "Hello headgy". Sonic looked over and saw the stupid character from the fan fiction me myself and sonic, Liz with her dumb looking friends Mel and Komodo. She pulled out her dumb paper clip chain and said," Your mine now head." But before she could finish sonic started to beat the shit out of her. "H..E..L..P..M…E." pleaded Liz to her friends as she was getting jacked up. Her friends shook their heads. Sonic quickly ran to the car grabbed a metal bat and hit Liz on the head hard. Blood went every where. Sonic picked up the body and put it in the trunk of the car. Sonic looked over at Mel and Komodo and ran toward them. He grabbed Mel's neck and choked her until she fell. Then he went to Komodo and snapped her neck. When they were on the ground sonic took out a lighter and burned their bodies on fire. Once their bodies were all ashes Sonic said," Sorry you scarred me." Rouge and Darin came out and got in the car. Sonic pulled out the gas thing and got in the car and drove off.

It was 9:47 and Sonic pulled over to a hotel for the night. They went in got their key and went to their room. When they opened the door they saw only two beds. Everybody looked at each other

~later~

Sonic and Darin felt very awkward in the same bed. Sonic and Darin looked over at the other bad and saw Rouge sleeping happily. "So umm," "Don't talk to me," said Darin cutting Sonic off. Sonic got up and said, "I'm going to go sleep in the bath tub," "You do that," said Darin turning over. Sonic went to the bathroom and got in the cold bath tub and eventually fell asleep.

To be continued

Next chapter: The Road Trip Day 2

Don't worry fan of Liz she comes back (as a piñata) I just had to diss her. Her stories really ARE terrible.

So review this even if you don't have a profile you still can. And also check out the spin-off Tails Jacked Up Life.


	10. Chapter 10: The Road Trip Day 2

Chapter 10: The Road Trip Day 2

Sonic woke up the next morning still in the bathtub. He got up and went out of the bathroom and saw Darin watching the Monster Buster Club. "Why do they have big heads and super skinny bodies," said Darin pissed off by the low budgetness of the show. Sonic looked over at the clock and shouted," HOLY SHIT WE NEED TO GO." Sonic grabbed Darin and Rouge and ran out the door. When they got to the car Darin said," Hey dad my PSP is in the trunk can I go get it." "Umm no let me get it," said sonic getting out the car. Sonic went to the trunk and opened it only to see Liz all bloody and bruised up. "Pleases let me go," she pleaded but sonic shook his head grabbed the PSP and slammed the trunk cover down hard. He heard a loud thump, which meant she hurt her head. Sonic got back in the car with an evil smile and handed Darin his PSP. Sonic backed up and they headed on the road.

Half way down the road Sonics stomach started to growl. Sonic pulled of the road and headed to a Burger King. "What are we doing," asked Darin. "I'm starving," said Sonic. He pulled up to the drive through. " Hello sir." Said the person at the window," Would you like some bagels." Sonic drove away before it got anymore annoying. Sonic looked over and saw Wendey's and since they would never stoop as low as bagels he decided to get something from there. He pulled up to the drive through and the person at the window said," Would you like are special today sir there DOUNUTS." "WHAT THE HELL THIS IS WENDEY'S FOR PETES SAKE." Yelled sonic. The person shook their head and pointed at the sign. Sonic looked over and noticed if you look close enough in very small letters that it says Wendye's and Dunkin Donuts. Sonic drove away with his middle finger in the air. Then sonic looked over and saw checkers. He saw a person turn around with fries in his hand so sonic knew that's where he wanted to go. While sonic was pulling up to checkers all he could stare at was the fries that the guy was holding.

"DAD LOOK OUT'. Screamed Darin from the back seat. Sonic finally released what happened. Turns out he was driving toward the fries and he ran over the guy. Sonic looked back and noticed that he ran over a lot and saw a lot of tire marks in the grass behind him. Sonic, Rouge and Darin all hopped out of the car and started looking at the guy while screaming " OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GODDDDD", "WOAH WOAH WOAH WOAH hold on a sec," said Sonic. Sonic started to walk forward and as he did the background turned black. "Hello person reading this," said sonic sounding serious. "If any of you happen to have an Xbox 360 send a message to the gamertag RNEJ10 saying YOU SUCK." "If you're wondering why its because he gets on my nerves and he blocked my communications cause he's a wuss". "Thank you", said Sonic bowing his head," Oh and Another thing the authors Xbox 360 is back up and working so yeah if you want to send him a friend request his gamertag is halo7458963." "Better hurry thou he has 85 and the maximum is 100." "And also send in your ideas for some chapters by using the review, even if you don't have a profile you can still comment." Sonic steeped back and the scene reappeared.

"OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO," Screamed Rouge," HIS FAMILY IS GONNA SUE ARE ASS." "Don't worry just throw it over there with the rest of the dead bodies." Said the owner of checkers. Sonic and them looked over and saw a large pile of dead bodies. "People always die near Checkers." Said the owner. " Yeah people do happen to die near checkers a lot don't they." Said Darin slowly moving his head toward the reader telling them that a lot of people happen to die near Checkers. "What wrong with him who is he looking at." Said the owner. "Don't know don't care," said Rouge," come on help me throw the body in that pile.

So they threw the body in the pile got the food and headed toward the wedding.

Next chapter: The hotel

Sorry I was gone all summer I wasn't allowed to make any more chapters the whole summer because of making fun of another story. But fanfiction will never keep me down!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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